Some days the answers is "yes." I do not wish to go away from God, but sometimes from myself and the incessant pull to do things "my way." I can imagine standing there when Jesus uttered this question. Many quietly took steps backward, arms folded, head shaking, sideward glances, and they slipped away.
Jesus asks us to do things we've likely never done: forgive lavishly, accept, engaged the wholly/holy other, die to self, and give freely. Yet, we live in a world that prizes success, measurements and competition, high places on the totem pole, and exclusionary relationships. It is no wonder that the early cultures had no other term for "Christians" than "Followers of The Way." They were different, they stood out, they defined new measurements of justice, charity, and fellowship.
What did I learn from my experiences of being lost? I learned that we tend to beat ourselves up for being lost, experiencing lostness, and that mires us even further. I learned that sometimes the fork in the road does not render any clues or clarity, that there is no road sign. Sometimes it is hard to answer "where do you want to go?" I learned that beyond my choice of which path to take, God is still there. It is not always an either/or proposition as I once thought. I learned that lostness sometimes is necessary to relinquishing the illusory sense of control or mastery. After all, I had to be lost in order to be found.
What holds me back from following? What keeps me from being a true disciple of "The Way?" My self, my wants, and my illusions. The moment I oblige pity, anger, regret, false hope, and comfort; the moment I forget that the Cross is at the end of this path, I have joined the ranks of those who slip back and who slip away from Jesus command.
In order to follow, I don't need to ask any questions, don't need to pack extraordinary provisions, I only need to keep it simple. I tap into the freedom, the abandon, the trust, and the adventure, all of it. Then and only then can I join the transfiguration witness: how good, Lord, it is to be here.
Sharing a couple of thoughts from today's meditation - from the book: "Think about a time you were lost...how you finally found your way." I think at some point I quit trying to find my way, but started seeking God's way, and I still feel lost because it is God's way and this way is followed only with prayer, His Word and his incarnation through other people that are on this way, too. (from Pastor Schultz).
ReplyDelete'The moment I oblige pity, anger, regret, false hope, and comfort; the moment I forget that the Cross is at the end of this path, I have joined the ranks of those who slip back and who slip away from Jesus command.'
ReplyDeleteI understand these feelings, yet over the years I've also sought out and have learned how to objectify these feelings.
Recently, I've come to understand that anger is not always a negative emotion. I submit that it is a valid and just emotion which may be useful as God's ambassador in this unjust world. But that's a side issue.
Pity or self-pity is a more debilitating and powerful emotional vice. Especially in the churches, which I find odd.
This emotion would require me to be angry, vain, and morbid all the time because I deserve better. I have a good heart and I don't deserve to be in the condition I am in today. I did the work, I put the time in and those who can't see me on the inside sabotaged my good work. May they burn in hell!!
Not a very healthy line of reasoning. Self-pity is self-importance and, although I'm not a psychologist, I believe, in varying degrees our psychopathic society produces this emotional manifestation in people.
The more I read the news, the more firm I am in my gut that this is the case. Very weak and a waste of lifetime. Being offended every day and all the time.
A more reasonable tact would be to let go, let it get ugly, (it more than likely will) and get on with using talents for the Kingdom.
All of this grovelling would subside if we could all merely use our talents and consistently seek the Kingdom.
Is that not Christ's first charge? Seek the Kingdom?
“If you have faith as a mustard seed, you can say to this mulberry tree, ‘Be pulled up by the roots and be planted in the sea,’ and it would obey you.
And which of you, having a servant plowing or tending sheep, will say to him when he has come in from the field, ‘Come at once and sit down to eat’?
But will he not rather say to him, ‘Prepare something for my supper, and gird yourself and serve me till I have eaten and drunk, and afterward you will eat and drink’?
Does he thank that servant because he did the things that were commanded him? I think not.[c]
So likewise you, when you have done all those things which you are commanded, say, ‘We are unprofitable servants. We have done what was our duty to do.’”
Very simple, what a light burden. Get on with it, use your talents, seek the kingdom, have faith, and carry on. Who do we think we are anyway?
If I am honest with myself, I have to say that if I had been there in the crowd that day, I would likely have been one of the ones who turned and walked away. This man, Jesus, was unconventional, radical, revolutionary, crazy. I doubt I would have had the courage, even if I had the desire, to follow him. Now, today? what is it that draws me to follow? It's not the promise of eternal life or salvation. That is too distant, even as I grow older. Rather, it is the need for purpose, for significance, for meaning in my life. What holds me back? Doubt. Alice asked which path to take. The Cheshire cat responded, "That depends on where you want to go." My response, like Alice's, is, "I don't quite know where I want to go."
ReplyDeleteI like that (in Pastor Joy's second paragraph): that the early Christians, the "Followers of the Way", were different, "they defined new measurements of justice, charity and fellowship". I'm thinking-- "charity" in the sense of kindness or leniency in judging others. We need so much more of that. Remember that part of Luther's explanation of the 8th Commandment in which he says: "...speak well of your neighbor, and put the best construction on all that he does." Sometimes that is very hard to do.
ReplyDelete'In order to follow, I don't need to ask any questions, don't need to pack extraordinary provisions, I only need to keep it simple.'
ReplyDeleteI've heard it said, everyone wants to be a leader, but they can't make up their mind.
I enjoy following God, he is a true gentleman who rarely gets in the way of things. He certainly isn't a control freak and he forgives me if my conscience is bruised or my heart aches. Couldn't ask for anything better.
i am creating a website and wanted to know if i could use your picture of the highway signs.
ReplyDelete